going back to school a.k.a ntu tomorrow. what am i doing in school one week before school starts? i must be mad. but too bad, must do some disgusting thing. haha trust me, i'm reluctant.

then perhaps we'll head down to holland village for some food and shopping! yeah!!

conspiracy ahead! lol but i don't feel guilty.

我现在想念你。没什么理由，就是突然觉得有你在，很温暖安全。即使在吵架，即使不说话，也能感觉你的爱，只要你在身边。我再怎么吵，你再怎么麻烦，我总会觉得一切都很好。因为我们相爱。

当初说在一起就是要开心，现在以后，都希望我们做的到。

baby i love u

lazing around, while mum's gone on another business trip to guangzhou.

unlike me not to blog for 3 days, but there's not been much going on. dimsum at redstar was not what we expected, so it was a little disappointing. but we plan to go shopping and maybe eat some good food next week=) just hope that it'll be cheap, and good. haha

羡慕你与他的甜蜜，也嫉妒他对你的温柔。但依然打从心底为你高兴。

不同方式的爱，不代表就是少一点爱。掌心的温暖直达心里，不也是一种感动。

solved a crisis yesterday, but i wonder how long can the peace last. had to cancel mahjong as a result, but tomorrow, we're going for dimsum!

lazy, but still got to sweep and mop floor today. and i want to find time to make apple sorbet! hee

please forgive me, for i'm flawed too, in my anxious love of both you and them.

i'm not forcing a change, i just thought to point the problem.

if i could, i would take back those hurtful words i said to you. i was never in this situation before. in fear of what might happen if you did not see what i see, i did not pause to care for your feelings, and spoke harsher words than was necessary.

i know some parts aren't true, and that the true parts aren't easy for you to change. i believe time and more amicable experiences can reverse the situation, lead to better understanding on both sides.

please forgive me, and believe i love you more, not less, with each passing day.

my parents are at sungei buloh now. haha with their company people. unbelievable.

won money at mahjong yesterday for the first time in my life. i must improve at mahjong! another session to test my skills on monday. don't want to cook already, decided just order pizza. =p

meeting some 2b people for lunch tomorrow, then sweeping the floor, and meeting ql for dinner. i'm no idler though i'm quite slack. haha

fri mahjong at my house. mon too. haha and worse, monday we aspiring to cook dinner. haha wonder if is gonna be edible. lol

uzbekistan win china 3-0!

i've realised the change in me, and realised it may not actually be as bad as i thought. it highlighted some problems, and so changes can be made for the better. don't want to give in so easily, don't want to give up so easily.

少了潇洒，是因为多份牵挂？

未来的路好漫长。

改变。

I keep thinking where is the xiao sa ming hui i know
I am not reproaching you, but I just hope you can see what is happening.
I miss the old Minghui you know?
Of course I will still love the new old equally.
But I just don't want to see you so xin ku.

touched to know a friend cares so dearly for me to risk putting our friendship on the line. to hear from her what is constantly close to my heart, i don't know how to react.

i would like for my friends to welcome my boyfriend, and vice versa. more so with my family. but after one encounter each that didn't turn out that well, i'm wary. and i don't want to try being a bridge if it ain't going to make things better. i don't want you to be judged badly by them. but you aren't exactly easy to get along with. that mj session, or other brief encounters with my friends have left me feeling tired, and awkward.

i know you love me, but i want to continue to have a life that includes all the people i knew before i'm with you. i need some space and freedom. i don't like being found every few hours, it makes me lose respect in front of my friends, and it ties me down.

i won't go around putting our relationship or myself in danger, so maybe you can relax and dont be so hostile towards my family or friends?

stumbled upon a host of blogs i didn't know about. and then i'm affected by the things they are feeling, the things that affect them. sad to know that i'm not as close to some as i would have liked to be. sad to know that some are not actually that happy. sad to know i wasn't there for one close friend.

just want to say, i hope you will feel happier soon. if you need me, just sms or call. or an email maybe?

and i'm paranoid that people who i didn't give my blog address to reads my blog. haha though lately not much worth reading. i would like to say identify yourself, you alien invader, but i'm just being lame. =p

i am guilty of judging people's other halves, even though i do not know them well, even though my judgment is based solely on a few incidents. but i'm slowly changing, for i know that a person who you've given your heart to, and who've you spent time with, is not easy to let go. and that person, no matter how imperfect they may be to others, you still love, cause he/she is able to accept your flaws and love you.

kind of bored this lazy afternoon, with nothing to watch on tv.

虽不算是最活跃的一份子，但毕竟也一同经历过那些令人感动的事。看到老师如此委屈，实在觉得不好受。但还是无法鼓起勇气回去。

baking session yesterday yielded nice chocolate cupcakes! although i was very stressed at having to help out. haha happy 21st roylimp!=)

sometimes i wonder, if this must always happen. it's just so tiring.

最后的一点，也都扔了。内心好不容易取得的平衡，是否不该去打扰？

i'm going to quit my telemarketing job. affecting my mood, and making me wound up. roy's birthday on friday!

吵闹过后，发现我更爱你。

如果能证明在你心里，我的位置无可取代，而再美的美女也动摇不了我们之间的爱与信任，那我便会心满意足。

changed bedsheets, swept and mopped the floor today. nice dinner at home, but now i'm feeling grouchy. despite seeing a cute hand print on my bed.

don't want to work tomorrow. don't want to keep going out and not staying at home. don't want to feel tired and irritable. don't want to spend so much money.

the four of us who attended 翔鹰2007之幻醒 at NAFA 3 this afternoon. mindan couldn't make it back from vienna on time!


the lovely 85 food.


my dear girl's who back from stuttgart! she who worries about my studies, and the direction which my life is heading. hmm thanks, i know your good intentions =)

had a good time singing karaoke with 2b yesterday. but was kind of hoping all 18 of us could have squeezed into one room. separation seems to make things less fun. but too bad, cause there's no room so large.

dinner was a troublesome affair. not wanting laksa, we went to parkway. queued up sakae, cause i was against fish n co. yet compromised and went to seat at fish n co, whereby they then wanted to change to ichiban sushi. which resulted in another half hour wait. hungry + waiting= grouch.

but dinner was quite good, the guys just like to talk funny stuff and be lame. and i saw roy 撒娇 which really is rofl material. =p celebrated fujuan's birthday too, with a nice chocz cake.

qiuling is safely back in singapore! although complaining about the little red dot's weather. hahaha welcome back!!

and poor mindan may not be able to come back in time for xiangying. but keeping my fingers crossed that she come back safely and then we can all go 85 eat the good old food =)

k-ing with 2b people later, hurray!

p.s. telemarketing is so stressing me out.boo

had a very enjoyable pizza hut dinner with my girls today. $12 plus for a choice of 3 pizzas, we're so going to get fat. and we took a photo that looks like we attended a wedding banquet, post when i get the pics from leen.

clinched one sales today, but not submitted, so not exactly a closed deal. oh well. minimum effort is required.

ate fish n co for dinner after my checkup at AH. and guess what, the doctor actually suggested i go for physiotherapy, since he says my shoulder is a little lax after dislocation. and he said something about higher risk, which made me feel ancient. haha

starting work tomorrow with a feeling of trepidation. hmm. wonder if i can stick through one month. let's see.

tired, just want to sleep. happy i'm having pizza hut dinner with my girls tomorrow

looking at the photos of evan and tingyan makes me want to go on holiday again. but i'm broke, so i need to start earning some money to mend the hole in my pocket. good thing, i've gst credits! yay!

oh, i realised the last harry potter movie was not prisoner of azkaban, but goblet of fire! haha though i did mean that prisoner was not nice. lol=p

in blog entries that you don't see, i clear out my thoughts, and become honest with myself. most of the time however, i still don't say half of what i want to say. could be that i don't want to have to eat my own words when more time has passed, or because i don't want the bad memories to always be there, in its full painful impact.

3 years have passed, and so much has changed, that i no longer feel the same person i was at age 18.

i just want to love, and be loved. 3rd time lucky?

somehow, i miss you a lot today.

埋怨归埋怨，你一句爱我就足以让我想起为何把心交给你。